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Shin Shan Cho
English 104
Professor Dan
11 December 2017
How Revision Plays Role in Academic Writing and Reading
People in the world changed their behavior and thinking as times go passed. For example, people who practice more on reading and writing, the more they will have knowledge about the concepts. In my experiences in learning English, I have gained some skills throughout my studying year. It is because time is the main key to become professionally in something that we are constantly doing. During those time, we will learn something new that we have never learned before however, as time passed we will become more familiar with what we been doing. In my essay 1, I stated “Nobody is born to be smart, intelligent to know everything. We all started from step zero where we do not know anything about the world which is full of unique things”. According to this quote, I claimed that everyone needs to take their time to learn new things because the more time we take, the better be in what we are doing. While I am learning to improve my writing style, I still have failure because I did not know the real definition of academic writing and reading. However, there is one thing I learned throughout this semester; revision is the main key to success in academic reading and writing.
Writing essays can be really difficult for me, especially as a college student. The reason why English Professors want us to write an essay is because they want to see how well we can interpret with the text and by ourselves. However, the first time that comes in our mind and write it down, it will not make the essay look perfect. It is because sometimes we might misunderstand the
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prompts or some main ideas might not included. Therefore, revision is really important in academic
writing because it gives us a second chance to look back our essays and see what are we missing. For
example, in my Essay 2 draft, there is one paragraph that I did not fully answer the prompt and
connect back to my thesis. I ended the paragraph by saying “It is because they want to explore the
experiment, activities, artifacts in San Francisco as much they can”. According to this quote, the
reader may not understand what I really wanted to say like why the fisherman’s wharf sign is the
main audience for tourists. Thus, in my revision I need to explain why the sign is important by adding
some evidences to prove my thesis. After revision, I wrote “One of the popular places to take
pictures in San Francisco is the sign with Fisherman’s Wharf. It is because the main audience for this
sign is for the tourists to persuade to visit San Francisco”. Now, this quote is directly answer to my
thesis and the whole main idea of the paragraph so the readers can more understanding what I want
to say. Therefore, I realized that revision is part of the academic writing to improve my writing skill.
Writing can be used as a way to understand what we read. The main purpose of reading is knowing main ideas, learning something and relating back to what the reading is about. In Essay 3, we all required to read the articles and choose one of the articles that we can relate the most with the authors. This is part of the academic reading because interpreting with the author can be determined how well we understand the article. In Anzaldua article I interpret, “Anzaldua made me recognize my culture of where I come from and my language. Moreover, I am admired Anzaldua's viewpoint that we should not give up our wild tongue even other people try to change”. According to the quote, I talked about what Anzaldua makes me proud, however I did not choose the right quote to show her pride to prove my interpretation. It is because I misinterpret with the quote I chose therefore it it doesn’t relate with what I want to say. After revision, I added one more quote from Anzaldua to prove that what makes me admired her. Therefore, the definition of academic reading is understanding fully about what the author’s main ideas and interpret with them. If we did not interpret with the quote correctly, there is always revision to fix the mistakes.
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Revision is really important in academic reading and writing because it can give us a perfect story in our writing. For example, I usually had to correct my grammar mistakes and sentence strategies in edited. For revision, I usually have to expand my ideas to make sure I interpret with what I am really want to say. Throughout my past semester year, I only taught to write essays and turned those into my teachers. I never had a chance to revise my essays after my past English teacher gave those back to me. Therefore, I never thought revision is part of the main thing in academic writing. Now, I see myself as an academic reader and writer in developing level but furthermore, I will continue to apply this method; revision throughout my future college years to become a better writer and reader.
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Shin Shan Cho
English 104/105
Professor Dan
11 December 2017
Reading the World-Word
The month of August is when I entered into the human world through my birth mother’s womb. I began to cry as loud as I could thus my mother could see how happy I was to be with her. My mom initiated me how to crawl, walk, talk, eat and so on. Nobody is born to be smart, intelligent to know everything. We all started from step zero where we do not know anything about the full world of unique things. I was born and raised in a small country called Myanmar, which is in Southern Asia located between China and Thailand. When I was five years old, my mom sent me to the kindergarten so I would not be behind with the other kids. I began learning the Burmese alphabet as well as the English alphabet. However, the main language I had to oblige was Burmese, therefore every text was written in Burmese. When I was in third grade, I was taught by learning English grammar. At that moment, there was not any problem at all because I could not see how the real world looks like. By the time, when I enter into the middle school, I was taught to memorize every text from the book. I had six subjects which were Myanmarsar, English, Math, Science, History and Geography. All I needed to do was memorize every single word from the textbook even the essay. Everything seemed elegant until I was in eighth grade because I was taught inside of the box. I never had a chance to think about if I expand my thinking, what the outcomes would be until I read “Reading the World” by Freire.
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By the end of 2012, the Embassy of the Myanmar Union sent a letter to my house that the visa was qualified to come to the United States. At that moment, I was so excited to come here to meet with my father. On May 1st 2013, my life had to restart from the beginning when I did not know how to speak. Luckily, I went to High School as a freshman, and everything was so new to me. I had to interact with people of different ethnicity and cultures, but using the main language which is English. The education system was incomparable for me because in my whole life I have read with narrow mind but in the US high school, it was all about critical thinking. I began to read books to become more open minded, however due to my lack of English vocabularies, it was really hard to adapt with understanding the reading and critical thinking. Moreover, I got a chance to think widely and wanted to explore what would be the outside of the box. Just like Freire, my experiences I faced and the effort I planted which shaped me who I am and how I read the world-word.
There was one thing I learned instantly after staying in the United States for one year that the critical thinking made me to see the world better with a modern mindset. Staying in my small hometown for thirteen years did not make me see the world what I am perceiving in the present. Later, I realized that memorizing the text made me only understand the surface of the text, but not the deepest meaning of the text. Freire says, “The student did not have to memorize the description mechanically, but rather learn its underlying significance”(8). He is saying that learning is not about memorizing, however learning the significance of the object and applying that into the reading. While I was learning to read the word- world, I still failed to do that so. The reason was that my sensation was not confident about where I come from and felt that I could not compete with people who lived here longer than me. Even though I started to explore to be open minded, however I did not believe in myself to enter the reading world-word.
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In my junior year of High School, there was a project called “Outside Reading Book.” Everyone had to read a book and present it to the class at the end of the semester. At that moment, there was a boy who is my sister’s friend named Eric gave me a book called “The Memory of the Light.” I started reading the book because the main character was a teenager girl thus I felt I could be able to relate to her. The story is about a girl who thinks that the world does not belong to her, however friends around her to make her see that there is always hope if she thinks she is meant to be part of the world. She becomes stronger because of her fellows’ kindness which made her motivated. The thing that I can relate with the story is that even my culture and my background where I am from can be different from America, however if I believe in myself that I can be part of them. To make myself believe, Eric motivated my reading experiences and he made me have faith in myself and understanding more about the world. He always told me to read more books to gain knowledge. Not only gaining knowledge moreover, reading makes me calmer, think positively and mature. Freire relates when he says “The actual act of reading literary texts is seen as part of a wider process of human development and growth based on understanding both one’s own experience and the social world”(5). In other words, Freire says that reading can make us change the way we see the world, develop the sense of maturity and knowledges. I can agree with Freire because the beginning of my journey when I did not know how to read, however once time passed, I had known and practiced to see world- word.
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Another thing that can impact my reading experience was the duration. No one can be successful in critical reading in one day. As the period passed on, starting from the basic solid foundation will add up and reach the successful goal. The ultimate purpose of a critical reading of reality takes a lot of time, effort and belief to fully understand the world- word. Every person has a different story to shape who they are and how they see the world. Even though I still have a long way to reach the successful path of reading and writing, I believe that my past experiences and future experiences will help me to understand the world by practicing and learning more about the context of the text. It is because comparing with the time when I did not speak a single word of English and the present when I am learning to become a better reader and writer. There are gaps between before reading the world as the words and after. Freire concludes,“In this reflection on the importance of the act of reading, I want to make clear once again that my primary effort has been to explain how I became increasingly aware of its importance in my own life”(9). According to this quote, Freire says that the efforts and time which are really impacted on a person to become successful in the act of reading. Therefore, I believe that if I keep doing what I am and believing in myself to do will become successful in the future. All I need to do is keep exploring and learning of the reading the world-word.
After reading “The Importance of the Act of Reading,” Freire made me strongly believe that my past experiences shaped me who I am right now. Those experiences are my lessons to learn and improve for my future reading goals. Now, I am in the college, there will be more opportunities to learn about the critical reading of reality that will offer me valuable experiences and utilize them into the world. The experiences and lessons I will learn from the college will make me have a better sense
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to see the world- word moreover responsibilities, maturity and interpersonal. Therefore, after college
I will be exploiting those lessons to share with people and helping them to read world-word.
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Shin Shan Cho
Professor Dan
English 104/105
4 December 2017
How Fishermen’s Wharf became the busiest area
San Francisco is located in Northern California, which is surrounded by the Pacific Ocean and San Francisco Bay. It is becoming one of the top five places to visit in the United States in 2016-2017 (“Best Places to visit in the USA”). But what makes San Francisco famous for? It is famous for Fisherman’s Wharf, Pier 39, Golden Gate Bridge, Lombard Street and etc. However, the most famous place many tourists like to visit is one of the busiest tourist areas which is called Fisherman's Wharf. It has a symbol sign in there which I will analyze about it. There are many exciting and fun things to do in Fishermen’s Wharf, therefore all of the restaurants and gift shops are pricy not only for residents and also tourists. Although San Francisco Fisherman's Wharf is expensive for residents and tourists, it is still an attractive and popular area due to the historical background, delicious seafood and tourists culture.
In the evening of summertime, when I departed from my work, I saw an enormous sign which grabbed my attention. The sign is included the appetising, huge red Dungeness crab inside of the giant ship’s wheel which built with strong wood and rope from the ship. The sign located between Jefferson Street and Taylor Street. Under the sign, there is a concrete of the slab which includes the listed people names who donated for Fishermen’s Wharf and designed by AD- Art Inc. The sign is not as colorful as it should be because it was built for a long time ago. However, the environment around the sign is marvellous which makes the tourists attractive and popular. Around the sign,
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Harbor. Therefore, every time when I went back home, this reminds me of my very first job and
wanted to explore why the Fisherman’s Wharf became so popular for tourists. In the world, there is
always history behind everywhere we perceive and live because of our old ancestry. In addition, the
Fisherman’s Wharf in San Francisco has a history when began from the late 1800’s when migrants
Chinese came there to fish and feed the workers of the Gold Rush. After that, Italian immigrants
came to the city of the bay and started investing in fishing, selling seafood such as shrimps, oysters,
crab and others. Moreover, they built the boats and create crafts to live as their living. As we can see
in Fisherman’s Wharf, there are a lot of sailboats near the shores. Surprisingly, most of the sailboats
belong to the third generation of fishermen, and they built up with the same style as the boats in Italy
to maintain Italian culture. Moreover, the sign symbolizes about the structure Italian style of sailboat
steering wheel and the Italian historical background in Fisherman’s Wharf. Therefore, now we can
see a lot of Italian seafood restaurants around the Fisherman’s Wharf.
Many tourists desired to go to Fisherman’s Wharf to enjoy the delicious seafood such as carb, shrimp but especially clam chowder served in sourdough bread bowls. The clam chowder originated from the Europe and it made with any types of seafood. However, as the clam chowder passed all over the world and by the time, it got here to San Francisco, Italian people recreated the original recipe which is eaten with sourdoughs. This makes San Francisco Fisherman’s Wharf unique and famous. At my work, a lot of tourists reached out to me and asked “ Do you know any good place for clam chowder?” At that moment, I did not know how to answer back to tourists. However, I used to tell tourists about where is a good restaurant, I always pointed out to the sign and describe about how good is the seafood around there. Even though I am currently living in San Francisco however, I do not know there because the restaurants around Fisherman’s Wharf is so expensive for me. Yet , even I have not eaten near around there; I still should know where because I live in here, therefore I should know the culture and history of Fisherman’s Wharf. Then, I can give good suggestion to tourists which makes them wonderful trip and maintain the reputation of Fisherman’s Wharf.
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Part of tourist’s lifestyle is traveling around the world because they want to spend time with their family or friends. They probably do not want to consider about money when they want to have fun in the different new place for them. Therefore, when tourists come to one of the most expensive place in San Francisco, which is Fisherman’s Wharf, they are willing to buy anything for their loved one. Another part of tourist's lifestyle is that taking pictures because they want to hold on to memories and share with other their family members or friends. One of the popular places to take pictures in San Francisco is the sign with Fisherman’s Wharf. It is because the main audience for this sign is for the tourists to persuade to visit San Francisco. Tourists love to explore the moment of spending time in San Francisco with activities and artifacts. The reason is that being a human when everybody feels happy when we travel around and experience new things the time we have not experienced. Therefore, the belief of the tourists wants to explore the culture of the resident, and what is the history behind because of the enormous sign in Fisherman’s Wharf.
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San Francisco is important to me because this is my new house and I will be living here for the rest of my life. Thus, I need to understand the culture of where I am living now. The thing I can relate to the Italian immigrants is that I still believe in Asian culture based on where I am from. However, exploring the new thing of American culture to combine and make me who I am right now. Therefore, the sign of the Fisherman’s Wharf is one of the examples which the culture will be still maintained additionally with the new concepts based on the environment place like eating clam chowder in a sourdough bread.
Fisherman’s Wharf is one of the best choices for tourists to explore when they visit to San Francisco because of the well-known clam chowder, history and the beliefs of tourist's culture. Everywhere has a specific history and culture to famous for. Nonetheless, Fisherman’s Wharf is really unique because this is a small community where Italian people show their culture and create the new culture with American even though they are far from their house. Many tourists love to come there to explore the history and enjoy the fresh seafood around them and have a good time with their loved one, family or friends. Therefore, the sign of the Fisherman’s Wharf is representing the history of San Francisco, Italian culture and seafood which is attractive food for every tourist.
Work Cited
“Best Places to Visit in the USA,” US News& World Report, travel.usnew.com/San_Francisco_CA/.
“United States History.” San Francisco`s Fisherman`s Wharf, www.u-s-history.com/pages/h2783.html.
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Shin Shan Cho
Professor Dan
English 104
15 December 2017
My Tongue shows my Identity
In this world, there are many different countries speaking their own individual languages. People can identify from each other’s language of whom they are and where they are from. The language I speak shows my identity, culture and this is who I am and where I originally come from. However, my culture can be vanished when immigrating to the most diverse cultural country which is the United States. The reason is that I obligated to learn a new language to adapt into the new society. As I was learning English which is my new language; I required to read many books and articles to improve my reading skill as well as writing. However, I did not comprehend the main theme of my essay which is, identity can show through language until I read “How to Tame a Wild Tongue” by Gloria Anzaldua.
To become a better active reader, I had learned that annotating is the main key to interpret with what I had been reading and understanding the main purpose of the text. In order to understand the main purpose of Anzaldua’s article, the first thing I did was skimming the pages to see the length of the articles. The reason why is that I wanted to see how long it will be taken to the culmination. Second, I started to read through text to text without taking any annotation. While I was reading, sometimes I had to find the meaning of new words and translate into my language. Then, I wrote the meaning of the words on the margin line. Lastly, I reread the text again and started to annotate it. While I was annotating, I asked questions back to the text and wrote the short summary of the
Cho 2 paragraphs. After reading Anzaldua’s article, I realized that she and I have some similarities which are being bilingual and were told to speak Standard English. Just like Gloria Anzaldua, being a bilingual has been difficult for me because I had been molded by my language on the other hand, I am trying to fit into a new foreign language by speaking Standard English. Language is one of the most essential needed in order to communicate with other people. It is really important to me because it represents everything about me: my identity, culture and beliefs. Gloria Anzaldua explains that "A language which they can connect their identity to, one capable of communicating the realities and values true to themselves"(35-36). According to this quote, she expressed that language and identity can be defined as one thing that those two are the same. The way she communicates with other people and what she does is illustrating of her identity. One way she illustrates her identity is when she says, “We needed a language with with we could communicate with ourselves, a secret language” (36). I agree with her point that identity can be known based on language because this is what I was adapted to my languages and that can never be changed. The language of Burmese is what I am capable to speak fluently and confidently because this is where I belonged and it shows my identity.
My life has been changed since I moved to the United States. I obliged to speak the primary language of where I am living in which is English and retains my main tongue of Burmese with my family. Knowing the primary language is important, however it does not have to be exactly the same like a native speaker. It is because I was not born in the United States therefore, I have not adapted to this culture since my childhood. Moreover, when someone tries to judge me based on my accent, that means they are trying to change my identity. In “How to Tame a Wild Tongue” Gloria Anzaldua
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elucidates that she had been told to speak like an American but not Spanish. She emphasizes that “Ethnic identity is twin skin to linguistic identity –I am my language” (38). According to this statement, she is saying that she has been influenced by the people of her identity, and this is a character of her. In her life, she has to adjust to her speaking based on the situation. Anzaldua claims, "Deep in our hearts we believe that Mexican has nothing to do with which country one lives in" (42). She tries to say that it doesn’t matter which foreign countries; we are living in however, the most important is to always remember where we come from and still maintain our culture even we are currently speaking two languages at the same time. Even though I am trying to fit into the new society by speaking English, however it does not mean other people cannot change my identity. It is because Burmese is my main language; identity cannot be apart, and it is always being together.
Being bilingual can have more opportunities than anyone else, however there are some chances of people will make a judgement of people like Anzaldua and me. We are both immigrants and knowing two different languages. Therefore, it can change our identity by speaking two different languages to different people. Now, I only speak Burmese to my family either at home or I am with them. However, the rest of my other time, I have been using English to communicate with other people to fit in the new society. Anzaldua feels, "There are more subtle ways that we internalize identification, especially in the forms of images and emotions" (42). She states that clarifying identity can be really deep because it can be happening in her deep mind. In her soul, she felt that her language should be still maintained her wild tongue even she was struggling with the judgement of people around her. “I will no longer be made to feel ashamed of existing. I will have my voice: Indian, Spanish, white. I will have my serpent’s tongue-my woman’s voice, my sexual voice,
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my poet’s voice” (40). I agree with her viewpoint because we all have our beliefs and languages based on where we come from. Anzaldua made me recognize my culture of where I come from and my language. Moreover, I am admired Anzaldua's viewpoint that we should not give up our wild tongue even other people try to change. Therefore, I am proud of my identity because it is unique and it can show my true oneself.
Identity is one of the important concepts in human life because it builds with languages, cultures and beliefs. Even it’s important to my life and Anzaldua however, we both are trying to fit into a new society by speaking in another foreign country’s language. According to become like everyone else, we have to read more books to become a successful person to communicate well with others.The reason is that we don’t want other people to judge us for not knowing the primary language of the country that we are living in. Therefore, I am trying to learn as much as I can to become a better reader by annotating to understand the main purpose. However, I still being judged by the other people for not speaking Standard English. Therefore, I and Anzaldua believe that people try to change our tongues which mean they want to change our identity. However, identity and the language we are speaking cannot be apart because it forms as the same thing which our identity shows who we are and what we are part of.
